I’m sure many of you have heard of “The Secret.” If you haven’t, it’s a documentary and book about getting everything you have ever wanted by “attracting” it to you through your thoughts and feelings.
I’ll admit, when I first read it, I thought it was a load of crap. And to a certain degree, I still do.
You can’t “manifest” awesome things into your life like a buttload of cash to travel the world or a smokin’ hot body just by thinking about it and feeling like “you already have it.” That’s just silly.
Just thinking about everything you want without actually doing anything differently, will never bring those things to you. That’s where I find “The Secret” to be misleading.
But it’s onto something with this whole “Law of Attraction” thing. Ultimately, the real secret lies in your actions, not in your thoughts. (See what I did there?)
The way the Law of Attraction works is that when you focus intensely on what you want, and feel the excitement and pleasure that having that thing will bring to you (like described in “The Secret”), it’s meant to DRIVE you to start taking the right steps towards achieving whatever it is that you want (that’s the part the book left out).
For example, if you constantly think about having a hot body, but spend your days sitting on your ass eating junk food, or going out every night and crushing a half-rack of beer, you’re never going to have a hot body regardless of how long and hard you picture it in your mind.
However, if you envision yourself having a hot body and think about how amazing you’ll look and feel when you have it, then you can use that vision of your future self as motivation to make healthier choices, be more active, cut back on the drinking, and get involved in healthy living communities.
When you make these changes to your current circumstances, you will absolutely attract more and more opportunities into your life to improve your body. You’ll be surrounded by healthier options, people, and experiences that will make it much easier to achieve the level of hotness your heart desires.
The same goes for money and traveling; just picturing yourself being more successful or having enough money to travel the world forever will never make more money magically start appearing in your bank account. That’s just called daydreaming.
But if you envision how you’ll make that money or make your business more successful, the pleasure you’ll feel when you succeed, and all of the worldly adventures you’ll get to go on as a result, then make a change in your life and start taking real steps towards achieving it, you’ll attract more opportunities for money, success, and travel.
Even if money isn’t your primary objective, it IS necessary for travel. One of the perks of being a digital nomad is funding our travels as we’re experiencing them, full-time!
So what types of “steps” and “action” am I referring to? Things like choosing the types of people you spend your time with, the communities you’re a part of, how you spend your free time, your hobbies and interests, and the type of lifestyle you lead.
What it all boils down to is this: if you aren’t CURRENTLY living the lifestyle that matches your desired outcome, how do you expect to ever achieve it?
That’s what the “Law of Attraction” is really about. And it applies to all aspects of our lives – health, lifestyle, money, travel, career, relationships, personal happiness, etc.
You need to think long and hard about what it is you want, what it will look like and feel like when you have it, and use that as motivation to work towards making it real.
Relationships have always been a big one for me.
Aside from a couple close childhood friends back home, I’ve always struggled to form meaningful relationships as an adult because I wasn’t meeting the kinds of people I wanted a relationship with – ones who inspire me, motivate me, and challenge me to be better.
But I realized in the past year or so, that I wasn’t living a lifestyle that would bring those types of people into my life.
I kept falling into the same type of crowd that I had been trying to avoid because, despite thinking about the types of relationships I wanted to have, I hadn’t actually made any changes to my methods of meeting new people.
In other words, going out and meeting drunk people at the bar, was only attracting more drunk people into my life. So instead, I thought about what this “Future/Better Bre” would do – how she would spend her time, the types of people she would hang around with, the decisions she would make…and I started doing those things.
I envisioned Future/Better Bre being health-focused, running her own online business while traveling the world, surrounded by healthy, active people who love adventure, and being able to easily connect with anyone she meets (I have a long history of being kind of socially awkward).
And I didn’t just sit around waiting for those things to magically happen in my life, because I knew I’d be waiting forever if I did and my circumstances would never change.
Instead, I quit drinking and watching TV, changed my eating and exercise habits, spent all of my free time studying and building my business, completed my Precision Nutrition Coaching Certification, launched my new blog and online coaching program, started making connections with other digital nomads and healthy living enthusiasts, took on a bunch of freelance marketing gigs for extra money, and bought a one-way ticket to Europe for my next big adventure abroad.
Over the past year, and particularly in the past 6 months, I’ve been making all of the lifestyles choices that are congruent with the types of people and opportunities I want to attract into my life – and as a result, they’re all becoming real.
I don’t want you to think this is something that comes easily for me. It’s something I practice and work on improving every day. I frequently carve out a little “self-reflection” time to check in with how my actions and choices line up with the things that I want, and I write down specific steps I need to take to move myself further towards my goals.
You should also note that this is a lifelong process, because we should always be striving to be a little bit better and setting new goals to go after. But it’s one that works. And becomes a lot easier once you’re on the right track. And the way to get on the right track is by making positive changes to your daily habits.
That’s what The Positive Change Co. is all about!
I challenge you to close your eyes and picture YOUR Future/Better Self. Think about what you look like, how you spend your time, the types of people you hang out with, the decisions you make, and how you feel about your life.
If your current behaviors don’t match those of your Future/Better Self…then it’s time to make a change!
And if that person you pictured happens to be a healthier, fitter, sexier version of you…
A more energetic, productive, and ambitious version of you…
Or a more confident, happy, and worry-free version of you…
Then let’s go on this journey together to becoming the Future/Better Self you imagine.
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